• 104 Plaza Center Serekunda, The Gambia
  • (+220) 4290383 / 7724021
  • info@scoutgambia.org
In Uncategorized

What Is The Definition Of Self-harm ☠

Many studies suggest casual sex isn’t as great as people think it is — at least not for guys. A 2010 Harvard University School of Public Health study found that men who had casual sex — defined as “sporadic” partners — were more likely to use hard drugs, such as cocaine, and more likely to engage in risky sexual behaviors. A German study published in 2009 found men who had casual sex with different women were less successful in bed with the women who are important to them (think of it as building that team of the future).

And a recent study published in The Journal of Sex Research found that casual sex was a predictor of lifetime sexual problems for women. So, is casual sex bad for you?

One reason that casual sex — or what we’d like to call “dating” more often — can be bad is that most people only pursue casual sex partners who they are sexually attracted to. Unfortunately, sexual attraction is not always mutual. Many women complain of being turned down by men they find appealing, and vice versa. Of course, men can turn out to be the oddballs — just because you’re attracted to a guy or a girl, that doesn’t mean they’ll want to be with you.

And here are a few other reasons you may want to stay away from casual sex:

1. Casual sex can damage your self-esteem — particularly if you’re not going to bed with someone you’re deeply interested in.

— sex experts.
If casual sex doesn’t feel like casual sex to you — if you like to think of it more as “dating” — then you’re definitely not alone. “There’s a whole category of people called ‘casuals’ who may not even want to call it casual,” says Diane Greig, Ph.D., a sex therapist in Toronto. While dating can have its own type of anxiety (different pressures to look and smell good, check in with friends, and politely insert yourself into situations), there’s a feeling of safety with a casual partner because they’re not looking for a serious relationship.

But when we limit ourselves to casual sex because we’re too afraid of potential damage to our self-esteem, it’s back to square one — we’re still not meeting anyone we like enough to go to bed with. “Oftentimes, casual sex is the gateway to a more satisfying and healthier sex life,” says Afton Henderson, author of I Kissed Dating Goodbye.

2. Casual sex is usually
bedpage bk

So casual hookups can be really good for the soul, and not just in a superficial way. Many people can’t communicate their innermost feelings and desires to each other, or are ignorant about what they truly want in life. Casual hookups — the idea that hookups are neither more or less than a good hookup — can be a neutralizing tool where people can simply be themselves. We’re all trying to figure stuff out: whether we’re confused about what we want, what we feel is right for us, what we need, and how to convey these feelings to others. The stigma of casual sex can often make that difficult. When hookups aren’t valued as such, feelings have a better chance of being expressed openly.
How hookup culture affects women
Obviously this applies more to men than women. Women have to plan — and more importantly, get ready — ahead of time because they may be showing up to a situation in which they’re not in a place to express themselves. It may be as simple as a separate amount of time and space being set aside for women, to simply being given the green light to be present and focus on her own mental states and needs. Essentially, women are allowed to not feel pressured to dress up, speak highly of themselves, or lean on guys for fulfillment.
Having casual sex can be extremely useful for women, as they can express their sexuality in a confident, non-dominant way. But you do have to pay attention to the aftermath. If you’re not feeling comfortable and begin to connect with someone, you may feel pressure to hook up even further and get closer. You need to be prepared for this, and some women are more prone to fall in the “no strings attached” trap because they don’t want to be pressured.
Men often have a misconception about what women want when it comes to hooking up. They expect women to look a certain way, or act a certain way, because of what they’ve seen in porn (and really, has it just gotten that bad?), in which they really have little control over. They may have preconceived ideas on how something should be and what they’re supposed to say, or do — which can be upsetting, confusing, and even downright frustrating. Of course, the reverse is also true. Women too can get nervous and apprehensive when a man acts like he’s ready to be intimate, or overpowers her. If you feel that your man has false expectations of you, it could be a red flag that you may


Gambia Scout