Why the Confidence You Think You Need Isn’t the Right One for a Date
You can’t fake confidence. Sure, you can put on a front (and sometimes that’s what you need to do if you’re entering into a scary new situation, like a first job or a first date with a new guy), but you can’t fake self-assuredness. You have to be absolutely certain of your choices and the way you answer people’s questions. If you’re not, if you don’t have self-assurance, then there’s no reason to put yourself out there like that.
The Bigger Reason You Need Confidence is the Larger Context
It’s not just that confidence makes you look better to guys in general, or women in general, or just the people you’re talking to. When you have it, it becomes a thing you do with everyone—a thing that is so powerful, that word “power” doesn’t do it justice. It’s a thing that lets you say what you mean, and mean what you say.
It’s a way of living the life you’re supposed to live, that you know you’re supposed to live. It’s a way of approaching life, approaching everything, that nobody can take away from you, and that means everyone respects you. Even if you don’t think you’re good at something, you have confidence that you can do something you should be able to do.
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It’s a list of things you can do, things you can learn, things you can see, that you want to do, and even things you want to learn. It’s a way of being human. It’s part of who you are. It’s a way of becoming a better person every day.
The Benefits of Having Confidence
If you’re not sure of your life right now, and you’re ready to take some risks and have some fun, being confident is a gift. If you’re good at many things, or good in many contexts, having confidence is a huge asset.
Confidence gives you the ability to put yourself in situations that, if you have some doubts, you would automatically freeze. It gives you the courage to go to parties that you wouldn’t normally attend, to talks that you wouldn’t normally go to, to places you wouldn’t normally go to, to situations in https://russianwifedating.com/pros-and-cons-of-russian-hookups-get-laid-with-a-moscow-girl.html
**Developing Chemistry.** Online dating can be such an efficient, efficient way to meet someone. Sites make it easy to be contacted, and people are often drawn to members who have uploaded photos. With more photos, too, a user feels like they have more of a chance to connect with someone. But in real life, developing a true connection is what really matters. If you can connect with that person and you feel comfortable with them, great, but if not, move on. What are the chances you will feel comfortable with someone, let alone like them, if you have no idea who they are?
**Focusing on Your Top Strengths.** Having self-esteem is essential for a fulfilling life, but it can be difficult to admit that you have shortcomings. This can make your dating life difficult. But are you sure that if a man asked, “What’s your biggest weakness?” you would actually want to share? Could you even admit it? Maybe you could if you were confident in yourself, but if you are out of tune with what you like about yourself, then you’re going to struggle when you try to find out whether someone else is in tune with you.
**Being Polite.** Even if your date has a bad skin day or has forgotten to take their makeup off, don’t make a beeline to the bathroom at the first sign of frustration. Accepting a problem gracefully is a great way to show that you have respect for yourself and are also prepared to give others the same respect.
**Being Independent.** Don’t put yourself in a position of having to date someone who is better suited to a previous or future relationship than you. You are what you are, and that’s all that should matter. Whatever you did to find that date should be used as a means to an end—find that person, and then discover whether or not they are a good match for you. Of course, if you happen to meet someone you click with immediately, then that’s terrific! But please remember that you have to pursue them, so that you can find out whether or not they are a good match for you.
**Giving Yourself Plenty of Time.** You may think that the person you are getting interested in will want to know when you are available so that they can get in contact. In reality, they are probably only looking for someone who is keen and prepared to give them time. Being unavailable can be a turn off for many